Cusp

by Nix
(crimsonquills AT gmail DOT com)


Author's Notes: Thanks always to my beta, kaly.


Of all the mutants sheltered by Xavier's School for the gifted, Kurt was somewhat surprised to discover that he was the most relaxed in Logan's company. The rough, subtly violent man was not someone Kurt would have expected to feel at ease with, but there it was. Perhaps it was because Logan was the newest resident of the mansion, next to him. He'd spent only a few nights there in the months before Kurt's own arrival.

Or maybe it was just that Kurt found Logan less intimidating than the other adults. Scott was wrapped up in his grief, hidden away behind ruby glasses. Professor Xavier was unnervingly powerful. Kurt had only begun to work past his first impression of the man as someone who could kill with a thought. Despite knowing Xavier better now, some hint of that remained. And Ororo...Ororo was so beautiful...

Whatever the reason, Kurt was glad for Logan's company as they settled down in front of the television. Kurt always watched late at night so that he could mutter lines along with the actors, improving his English. It irritated the others, but Logan didn't seem to mind. Kurt supposed that the other man, a frequent insomniac, had built up a tolerance for the late night quirks of others.

They were barely ten minutes into an evening movie when Kurt noticed movement out of the corner of his eye. Turning, he saw Scott Summers hesitate for a moment in the doorway.

"Don't just stand there," Logan said, not bothering to turn around. "Join the party." He held up an unopened beer.

"I... No, thank you," Scott answered. Kurt could almost see the weight that had settled on his shoulders. "I have work I should do."

"That man needs to get laid," Logan muttered, glaring at Scott's retreating back.

Kurt knew he was not meant to have heard the comment, but he had. And, having heard it, he couldn't let it go. "It has only been two months since he lost his wife, Logan," he said softly, keeping his eyes on the television.

"Look," Logan said. At the tone of his voice, Kurt felt compelled to turn and meet his gaze. "I don't mean to be sound cold. All I'm sayin' is that it might help him to remember that his life ain't over."

Kurt sighed. "Not everyone is comfortable with casual sex."

"Am I offendin' your tender sensibilities?"

"No, only my sense of tact," Kurt said, his lips turning up at the corners.

Logan, apparently, failed to pick up on the humor. "I'm not about to go tip toeing around your sense of morals, Wagner." He snorted. "I enjoy sex and I see nothin' wrong with that. I'll leave the wailing and beatin' of backs to you Catholics."

Kurt sat up a little straighter, his tail curling and uncurling where it was wedged between his thigh and the arm of the couch. "You should not make assumptions about a man's faith, Logan," he said. "Knowing that I am Catholic does not mean you know my feelings on every subject."

"You were just comin' down on me for mentioning casual sex," Logan pointed out. "And last I checked, the Catholic Church still counted fornication as a sin."

"If I were to take everything in the catechism so literally," Kurt said somberly, "I should have to count myself damned by my very nature. What then would be the point of prayer - or even of faith?"

"I don't follow."

"Look at me," Kurt commanded. "Really look at me. Am I made in the image of God? Most would say not. But one could say that God is spiritual and has no image. Then tell me - what is my teleportation but sorcery?"

"Your mutation-" Logan began.

Kurt cut him off. "Is not well understood. None of us can be easily explained, Logan. Mutants occasionally defy even the laws of physics, as we know them. I can think of nothing more likely to be known as sorcery than actions that contradiction such 'natural laws'."

Logan was beginning to look troubled. Kurt pushed onward. "Enmity, strife, dissension...these are also called sins. We stand against Magneto, yes? Mutants stir up a great deal of strife and dissension in all of life. I could go on with a hundred more examples, but I think you begin to see."

Kurt shrugged. "Religion is a personal thing, mein Freund. We each must interpret those things which are written, as it was only men who did the writing. I am counted Catholic because I feel comfort and connection in the rituals of that religion. We do not all live our lives in the same way."

Logan thought about that for awhile. "So where d'you draw the line when it comes to the beast with two backs?" Kurt just looked at him blankly. "Slang for sex," Logan clarified.

"Ahh," Kurt said, distinctly amused. "Back to that."

"Yeah, back to that," Logan grunted, but it was apparent from the grin tugging at the corner of his mouth that he'd caught the humor in Kurt's tone this time.

"I suppose," the teleporter said philosophically, "that it is sex without affection that I object to. I don't believe there is anything sinful in an act of comfort between friends, or in an act of love between two who might not be permitted to marry...for whatever reason."

"I take it you'll be waitin' for marriage, then."

Kurt smiled ruefully. "I've never truly considered it," he admitted. "The issue does not really apply to me."

Logan raised an eyebrow. "What's so special about you that you get an exemption?"

"No exemption," Kurt answered. "In my case, the question is pointless."

"I don't get it."

"You would not," Kurt said, tilting his head to the side a little. "You are an attractive man, Logan. I am sure you have had...considerable interest." He lifted his hands, though whether as a gesture of helplessness or to display them was uncertain. "I have not. So, as I said, the question really does not apply."

"You shouldn't sell yourself short, Kurt." The teleporter started in surprise and whipped his head around to find Ororo standing in the doorway. Her face had settled into familiar lines and she raised one eyebrow as if to ask 'are you sure about that?' "Different," she went on, "doesn't necessary mean undesirable."

"Ah..." Kurt trailed off. Ororo smiled slightly and turned to leave. He watched her go, still a little startled, but was brought back to the present when Logan started chuckling to himself.

"Maybe you'd better start applying the issue," Logan managed between chuckles.

Feeling his cheeks flush, Kurt was suddenly glad for his unusual complexion. Unfortunately, judging from Logan's snickering, it hadn't disguised the blush quite well enough.

--End--